The duty of a stepparent is to find a way to connect with their partner’s children, and it might be difficult if hovering is a factor. Many parents today spend hours chasing down their kids to force them to eat, take a jacket on cold days, and they may even be the type to follow their children to school with their forgotten homework. Single adults who have lived alone for years are not used to this type of parental interference, and it can often be a sign the relationship will not work out well for anyone.
Becoming a reliable adult means learning how to do things without constant help from a parent, and the hoverers are often unable to let go of their children long enough for this to develop. They might find their new spouse has a completely different view of parenting, but they could have avoided talking about it before the wedding. When it becomes apparent a new spouse is unwilling to drive to school to drop off a jacket or forgotten homework, an argument and resentment could ensue.
Children are often aware of the disagreements between their biological parent and their stepparent, and some of them are quite ready to take advantage of it. While the children of most parents are able to be fairly responsible on their own, those who have hoverers for parents are used to a very different standard of living. They expected to be chased down with forgotten items, and it can be painful when they finally have to face consequences for their own behavior.
Being a stepparent is never easy, but the adaptation when parental hovering and interference is a factor can create hardship on the entire family. The relationship can still survive, but it will take patience on the part of both the adults and children to make it work out well.